5 Times to Be Alert

Self-control is difficult. Ask anyone who has struggled with addiction and they can tell you. Whether that addiction is to alcohol, drugs, sex, or other activities, controlling urges can be extremely frustrating. Someone who deals with eating disorders, cutting or other compulsive activities can attest to this as well. Even controlling what we say at certain times can be hard. Yet there are some times where controlling self seems even more difficult than normal.

Someone several years ago came up with HALT (a B was added later to make it HALT-B). It is an acronym for helping people recognize certain times or situations where they should be on alert. It is during these times that people who struggle with addictions or compulsive behaviors will notice that the urges to use or act out are greater. You might call them times of weakness. So what are they?

HUNGRY

I don’t know about you but I get a little ill when I haven’t eaten. Most of us also get physically weak, too. When our energy drops (sometimes along with our sugar) and we don’t feel very good it is an open door for us to do the things that make us feel better. For a person who binges on food that is, of course, a time that it can happen easily. For someone who is struggling with an addiction it can also be a very difficult time. It is also a very avoidable problem. Eat healthy meals at regular intervals to avoid the crashes and hunger.

ANGRY/ANXIOUS

I have always seen anger used in this acronym the most, but certainly times of anxiety are warning signs as well. Both have to do with losing control. When a person becomes angry about something they become more and more out of control in their emotions. It doesn’t always lead to a relapse but it is certainly a time to be on the lookout. When our emotions rise our ability to reason things out begins to lessen. When our reasoning is inhibited then we are likely to make worse decisions.

Anxiety fits here as well. It is during anxious moments that many people turn to the activities that “soothe” for the moment. Whether that is a substance or a particular action that goes along with an obsession or compulsion, you may end up once again losing control (which will only lead to more anger and anxiety). So during seriously emotional times or times of high anxiety stay on the lookout.

LONELY

Another time that we have been warned about is loneliness. I have seen this particular one in many of the clients that I have met with through my years in counseling. Loneliness brings on the emotion of sadness. Again, any extreme emotion may take away the ability to reason. Even our popular country songs and Hollywood movies have indicated that when people are lonely they drink or take part in destructive activities. That certainly doesn’t have to be the case, but unfortunately it has been the track record for many people.

TIRED

I already discussed the problem hunger presents. Being tired is not too different in that they both have to do with our physical bodies. Just as it is important to eat regular, healthy meals, it is certainly important to get rest. We were not made to survive without it. When we fail to get the rest we need our minds are not as sharp and our minds and bodies become weak. In turn, we make bad decisions that we might not have made under normal circumstances.

So just as I encouraged you to eat regularly and properly – do the same with your rest. Know what amount of sleep your body functions best at and aim for that. 8 hours has been recommended but some people find that they are sluggish if they sleep that much. They seem to run better on a little less or a little more. Know your own body and its needs and act accordingly.

BORED

Finally, being bored was added to the list. Some people simply get into trouble because there is nothing better to do. Some people like to eat when they get bored. Others turn to drinking. Many more turn to pornographic material or other addictive behaviors. We live in an age where our minds constantly long to be entertained or amused in some way. When that isn’t happening we turn to things that will hopefully bring “excitement.” Unfortunately, many of those things come with unwanted consequences.

What do we do?

One of my favorite cartoons as a kid was G.I. Joe. I loved the part at the end of the cartoon where they would teach some survival technique and say, “Now you know and knowing is half the battle.” So I would say to you that now you are aware of these things that can be your vulnerable moment – knowing that is at least half the battle. When you have those times memorized your brain will automatically send an ALERT message to you when you are feeling hungry, angry/anxious, lonely, tired, or bored. You will understand that it is a good time to step back and evaluate your needs at the moment.

It is also important to have a game plan for when those ALERT messages come to you. You will need to make a game plan that will be tailored for you. It might be having a healthy snack in the office drawer. Maybe it is a friend that you can call when you are feeling anxious, angry, or lonely. Perhaps it is simply having some healthy games or puzzles that you can work when you find yourself getting bored at home. Many people have exercises or activities they can involve themselves in when times get hard.

What do you enjoy? What would make those moments pass by a little easier? If you don't know what that game plan needs to look like get with a friend, family member, or counselor and brainstorm healthy things that you can do instead. One way or another, get your game plan together. Difficult times will come but you can certainly make it through those times if you are prepared.

Ben