Discipline and Instruction

As I sit here writing this article, my youngest son is sitting right next to me quizzing me about what I am doing. He can’t really read yet but he can tell when I’ve hit delete and started all over, which has happened several times as I’ve struggled to come up with just the right words to say on this day.

As he asked me the third or fourth time about how I made the words disappear, and I tried to shelter his view so that he wouldn’t see me make another mistake, I finally found the right words. When Paul wrote to fathers he reminded them to bring their children up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord (Ephesians 6:4).

Part of discipline and instruction is correction and guidance. I’ve messed up so much in my time as a father. My dad messed up and my granddad messed up. It’s the same for mothers. There are no perfect parents. If we attempt to portray perfection we do a disservice to our children.

God never allowed us to perceive any heroes of the Bible as perfect except Jesus, whose perfection was required for the sacrifice. Every other hero (many who were fathers and mothers) had struggles and failures.

While it is difficult to reveal your struggles, failures, and weaknesses to your children, remember that your battle may one day help them fight their own. When they see you wrestle with God in prayer and search for the answer in God’s Word and lean on his people for support then it will serve as instruction.

There are certainly things in life we want to shelter our kids from at certain ages, but be careful not to portray perfection and set them up for a fall when they are grown. They need to know where to go when they struggle and as godly fathers I’m convinced that it will be a path that goes straight to the Father. Even in your struggle they will find direction.

Ben