4 Thoughts on Depression and Suicide
Several years ago the world was shocked to hear of the death of one of our generation's great comedians, Robin Williams. When I was younger I loved to watch the show Mork and Mindy and the Disney movie Aladdin is still one of my favorite movies of all times, due in part to Williams doing the voice of the genie. He starred in many amazing TV shows and movies and as you know he had an amazing talent to make people laugh. His tragic suicide, however, should serve to remind us of a few important things.
1. Don’t judge a book by its cover. There are a lot of people who have the appearance of perfection. You look at them and think, “Wow, they really have it all together.” We are envious of the life they live without truly understanding the kind of torture that lies behind the smile. People deal with all sorts of things that we never see. Depression is only one of many psychological disorders that exist in our fallen world. In fact, one of the largest books on my shelf is the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM). It describes each of the known mental disorders and it has to be updated often to keep up with others that continue to be discovered. So, there are many underlying problems that people are carrying with them every day. Don’t assume that someone “has it all together.” On the other hand, don’t be swift to judge bad behavior of some people. What’s on the cover doesn’t always reveal the whole story.
2. People are afraid of what they don’t understand. His death caused shock waves in the world and there were many different feelings and emotions toward his actions. Some attacked his actions while others glamourized them. Most people were stuck somewhere in the middle. Now, several years later, it has been revealed that Williams was suffering from Lewy Bodies Dementia, a condition that my own father is now suffering with. It comes with delusions and paranoia and depressive episodes.
Still, suicide is hard to wrap our minds around. Family, friends, and fans are left to reel over the devastating news that someone so close to them could make the decision to leave this earth. Only in many cases some people perceive it as the only way out. For other people reality has been so skewed by mental illness that good judgment has been taken away. Please don’t misunderstand me; I do not condone suicide nor do I think suicide is the answer to any problem. It is not glamorous or something that provides freedom. It is a person’s last-ditch effort to destroy the loneliness and despair that is ravaging their heart. Those feelings are there due to the illness of depression. Depression knows no social, racial, or economic boundaries. It affects the young and old, rich and poor, males and females. Depression has varying levels ranging from a melancholy mood to deep and dark depression characterized by hopelessness and helplessness (the later are usually the cases that end with suicide attempts). The wide range of moods further complicate the views that we take on depression. What happens is that we either refuse to talk about it or we lash out in anger because we don’t understand it. Both are the result of fear.
3. Prevention is the only medicine. Most people spend so much time thinking about the eternal consequences for those who have committed suicide that we forget that the greatest cure is prevention. Identifying depression in yourself or a loved one and recognizing the signs that someone is contemplating suicide is paramount to helping prevent further heartbreak. If you notice one or more of the following symptoms of depression seek help: feelings of helplessness or hopelessness, loss of interest in daily activities, appetite or weight changes, sleep changes, anger and irritability, loss in energy, self-loathing, reckless behavior, concentration problems, or unexplained aches and pains. The warning signs for suicide include: an unusual preoccupation with death or dying, acting recklessly, getting their affairs in order, calling or visiting people to say “goodbye”, or a sudden change from extremely depressed to happy and calm. If you notice these thoughts or feelings in yourself or someone you love please seek help. Don’t wait until it is too late. Prevention is the best...the only medicine.
4. Mental disorders are nothing to be ashamed of. Many of the things people struggle with mentally are of no fault of their own. I rarely hear people talk about how ashamed they are at having the stomach virus or the flu. Those are physical ailments that were not intended. In the same way, no one wakes up and decides to have depression, Bi-Polar, or anxiety. They happen. The good news is they can be treated and managed. While we cannot prevent every situation, we may be able to change the lives of one or two. That in and of itself would be worth it.
Ben